The 3rd Gear of Life: Managing Seeing Others Succeed

The 3rd Gear of Life: Managing Seeing Others Succeed

The third gear of life is managing seeing others succeed. It’s about knowing your limits, and then working to improve on them. When you see other people doing well in areas where you are struggling, it can be disheartening for many reasons. It may make you feel like they’re better than you; or that they don’t deserve what they have; or that no matter how hard you work, nothing will ever change for the better. But if we want to live a happy life, we need to learn how to manage this feeling of jealousy and come out stronger on the other side.

Why do we feel this way when someone else succeeds in an area where we are struggling?

It may be a complex combination of factors, but a common cause of a defeatist attitude is low self-esteem. We’re social creatures and we compare ourselves to others, both in appearance and in accomplishments. The fear of being disliked or embarrassed motivates us to hide our shortcomings from others so that they won’t judge us harshly.


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This fear can grow into a self-fulfilling prophecy– when we shy away from opportunities for socializing, practising our skills, or presenting our ideas, we lose practice and confidence. This leads to feeling even less confident about the next opportunity that comes along. Our fears are justified when we do fail, which reinforces the feeling that it’s better to avoid than expose ourselves.

Photo by Kammeran Gonzalez-Keola from Pexels

The next time you feel inferior or unworthy in a situation where you should be succeeding instead of failing, take heart — there is hope! With awareness and practice, your self-confidence can grow so much that even if someone else succeeds in an area where you’re struggling, you don’t feel any loss–instead, use their success as motivation for yourself.

The key is identifying the core issue underneath these negative reactions: fear of failure and rejection. As long as your ego remains attached to this need for approval from others (which stems from low self-esteem), make sure not to compare yourself with anyone around you–everyone has different sets of strengths and weaknesses.

What is the 3rd gear of life?

The 3rd gear of life is a metaphor for learning to live with other people’s success.

When we walk through life and see others succeeding, it’s natural to feel a little down. Why didn’t that opportunity come my way? Am I really cut out for this career path? What if they get promoted before me again!?

Don’t worry—you’re not alone in feeling like the odd one out when you see everyone else succeed! It’s actually quite common amongst people who want success on their own but don’t know how to handle seeing other people achieve what they desire.

This is because envy can trigger negative emotions such as anger or sadness; these feelings put us into a bad mood and make it difficult to be happy for those whose accomplishments we admire (and perhaps secretly wish were our own!). The good news: there are several techniques you can use to get out of your funk and learn how to manage seeing others succeed.

How can you manage seeing others succeed?

I don’t think that you can really “manage” this feeling. However, I do believe that you can deal with the negative emotions that it provokes by talking to a trusted friend or by attending a support group for other people who are struggling with the same feelings.

What does it mean to live a happy life?

When I think about what does it mean to live a happy life, the first thing that comes to my mind is achieving your goals and living your purpose.

The next thing that I think about when I think about living a happy life is setting attainable goals for myself and striving to achieve them. There are many things in life that can be out of our control but that does not mean that we should just give up on doing other things that are within our power. When people push themselves to their limits, they are more likely to have a happy life because they are fulfilling their potentials.

I do believe in achieving dreams and fulfilling your purpose but I also think that it is important to take care of yourself. If you constantly push yourself to the brink of exhaustion, happiness will not be something that can easily come by for you. Do what makes you happy because when we are focused on things that make us happy then we tend to accomplish more than just working towards a goal or dream.


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The next thing about life is having good relationships with people around you such as friends and family members. Having supportive people around me gives me encouragement knowing that they have my back and vice versa allows both parties involved to feel like there is someone out there who cares about them no matter what. It may sound cheesy but making sure these kinds of relationships are well maintained is very important for the soul.

The next thing about living a happy life is setting attainable goals for myself and striving to achieve them. There are many things in life that can be out of our control but that does not mean that we should just give up on doing other things that are within our power. When people push themselves to their limits, they are more likely to have a happy life because they are fulfilling their potentials.

Photo by Abhishek Gaurav from Pexels

The techniques I use to get out of my funk are:

1. Go for a walk

2. Read self-help books

3. Live in the moment

4. List your accomplishments

5. Challenge negative thoughts, beliefs, and assumptions

Takeaways from this post for managing seeing others succeed and living a happy life

One of the most important takeaways from this post for managing seeing others succeed is to recognize your strengths and weaknesses, acknowledge the things you are good at, and nourish those parts of yourself. It is also crucial to work on building social skills with the ultimate goal of being able to create relationships with people, not just exist with them. And finally, it is important that you learn how to live in balance by finding time for what’s important to you.

Final Thoughts

It is not easy to manage seeing others succeed. It can be hard on your ego and it may lead you to question why you are not succeeding as quickly or in the same ways that they did. The truth of the matter, however, is that success looks different for everyone and there’s no one set path to get there.

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